He makes us Shine

This morning while I was cleaning the bath tub, I was thinking. "Uh, how dirty is this bath tub?" I was using Comet to scrub away the soap rings and dirty film around the perimeter of the tub. I was really working up a sweat. I could see the dirt mix with the powered green bleach and I looked around I thought, "This is what my life must look like to God." Dirty, full of soap scum and a light brown film of dirt all around the outside perimeter. Dirty with sin- the film of the gossip I shouldn't have said, sin of how I treated my husband yesterday. Filmy stains of the dirty way I got angry with my son and spoke harshly to him.

"Ugh-is this ever going to get clean?" I thought.

As I finished scrubbing-I grabbed this huge white cup and turned on the faucet of water. I thought of the living water of God...it makes our lives clean.

And then it hit me- "This must be how God feels about us."

He allows us to get dirty. Then he scrubs us- he agitates us. He rubs us with the hard trials. He puts pressure on us to test our faith. He uses whatever He can to scrub out the filmy sin out of our lives.

When I finished scrubbing the entire tub, I was almost excited to see the final end product. I filled up the white cup and I began to rinse the tub. Gone were the soap scum stains. Gone were the light brown dirt rings. All that remained was a shiny new surface- it was gleaming. I was pleased. And I am sure when we are faithful to God to confess the sin in our lives --and repent, or turn from it He makes us shine- for His Glory.

God continues to look for the stains, the light brown water rings and yes, even the hardened dark rusty stains. I got the Comet out and scrubbed the areas I missed. I think God does this too- he allows the same kinds of trials until we surrender to Him. The dirt finally gives way to the Comet. And we too, can give way to Christ. I believe God is more pleased to get the hardened rusty stains out just like He is more pleased when we surrender the things in our lives that keep us from knowing Him.

Thanks for stopping by.

Love God Most to Love you Best

Everynight before the kids go to bed we say our prayers as a family. The prayers can be anything from 'keep us safe' to praying for for a family or friend who is sick. But my favorite part is when the kids are put in bed all tucked in for the night. I begin to walk away and the battle begins. "I love you" then I chime in "I love you more" then they say "No, I love you more." This goes on for a few seconds until someone says it. "I love God Most to love you Best." Isn't that the truth? We can't really love our friends and family best until we know that our love for God is first. We love Him most so that He can help us to learn others best. If we follow Christ's example, we truly are able to love our family and friends best. So here's to you- "Love God Most to Love you Best!!"

Lordy, Lordy, look whose Forty!!

Clint, my most-wonderful-husband-ever, just turned forty in November. I was on the fence about having a big-to-do party for him. I really had not thought much about the idea of him turning forty until my BSF teaching leader, Esther Farhat, said, "Forty denotes completeness." That thought made me think... what do the scriptures say about the number 40?

Here's what I found...

Genesis 7:4 The Lord said to Noah, "I will send rain on the earth for forty days and forty nights, and I will wipe from the face of the earth every living creature I have made."

Genesis 8:6-7 "After forty days Noah opened the window he had made in the ark and sent out a raven and it kept flying back and forth until the water had dried up from the earth.

Genesis 25:20 Isaac was forty when he married Rebekah

Genesis 26:34 Esau was forty years old when he married Judith

Genesis 50:3 It took forty days for the time of embalming after the time of death for Jacob

Exodus 16:35 The Israelites ate manna forty years, until they came to a land that was settled; they ate manna until they reached the border of Canaan."

Exodus 24:18 "Moses entered the cloud as he went up on the mountain, And he stayed on the mountain forty days and forty nights."

Exodus 34:28 Moses was there with the Lord for forty days and forty nights without eating bread or drinking water."

Numbers 13:25 "At the end of forty days they (Israelites) returned from exploring the land."

Numbers 14:33-34 "33 "Your children will be shepherds here for forty years, suffering for your unfaithfulness, until the last of your bodies lies in the desert. For forty years—one year for each of the forty days you explored the land—you will suffer for your sins and know what it is like to have me against you."

Numbers 32:13 "The LORD's anger burned against Israel and he made them wander in the desert forty years, until the whole generation of those who had done evil in his sight was gone."

Deuteronomy 2:7 "The LORD your God has blessed you in all the work of your hands. He has watched over your journey through this vast desert. These forty years the LORD your God has been with you, and you have not lacked anything."

Deuteronomy 8:2 "Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands."

Deuteronomy9:18 "Then once again I fell prostrate before the LORD for forty days and forty nights; I ate no bread and drank no water, because of all the sin you had committed, doing what was evil in the LORD's sight and so provoking him to anger."

Deuteronomy 9:25 "I lay prostrate before the LORD those forty days and forty nights because the LORD had said he would destroy you."

Deuteronomy 10:10 "Now I had stayed on the mountain forty days and nights, as I did the first time, and the LORD listened to me at this time also. It was not his will to destroy you."

Deuteronomy 25:3 "but he must not give him more than forty lashes. If he is flogged more than that, your brother will be degraded in your eyes."

Joshua 14:7 "I was forty years old when Moses the servant of the LORD sent me from Kadesh Barnea to explore the land. And I brought him back a report according to my convictions."

Judges 5:31 "So may all your enemies perish, O LORD!But may they who love you be like the sun when it rises in its strength." Then the land had peace forty years."

Judges 13:1 "Again the Israelites did evil in the eyes of the LORD, so the LORD delivered them into the hands of the Philistines for forty years."

1 Samuel 4:18 "When he mentioned the ark of God, Eli fell backward off his chair by the side of the gate. His neck was broken and he died, for he was an old man and heavy. He had led Israel forty years.

1 Samuel 17:16 "For forty days the Philistine came forward every morning and evening and took his stand."

1 Kings 19:8 (Elijah) "So he got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God.

Psalm 95:10 "For forty years I was angry with that generation; I said, "They are a people whose hearts go astray, and they have not known my ways."

Jonah 3:4 "On the first day, Jonah started into the city. He proclaimed: "Forty more days and Nineveh will be overturned."

Matthew 4:2 (Jesus) "After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry."

Luke 4:2 (Jesus) "where for forty days he was tempted by the devil. He ate nothing during those days, and at the end of them he was hungry."

Acts 1:3 "After his suffering, he showed himself to these men and gave many convincing proofs that he was alive. He appeared to them over a period of forty days and spoke about the kingdom of God."

Acts 7:23 "When Moses was forty years old, he decided to visit his fellow Israelites."

Acts 7:30 "After forty years had passed, an angel appeared to Moses in the flames of a burning bush in the desert near Mount Sinai."

Acts 23:13 (Plot to kill Paul) "More than forty men were involved in this plot."

Acts 23:21 "Don't give in to them, because more than forty of them are waiting in ambush for him. They have taken an oath not to eat or drink until they have killed him. They are ready now, waiting for your consent to their request."

2 Corinthians 11:24 (Paul) "Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one."

Hebrews 3:9 "where your fathers tested and tried me and for forty years saw what I did."

Hebrews 3:17 "And with whom was he angry for forty years? Was it not with those who sinned, whose bodies fell in the desert?"

So apparently forty is a significant number is the bible and it does mean alot to God.

Whether it is 40 days of fasting, 40 days alone on the mountain with Him, or the rain stopping after 40 days and 40 nights, 40 is significant. So we did have a big party for Clint. Afterall, he's 40!! I told him that his life is full- full of blessings.

So Happy 40th Birthday Clint and all my friends who have recently or will soon turn 40!! I hope you are encouraged that the number 40 is a blessed number that relates to completeness and fullness in the bible. I hope you know that your life is full and complete in Christ!

"I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:10

Ava Cries Out

We know that the time is coming when we will need to say goodbye to to Ava's tattered old "blankie." Ava is 4 years old and she even speaks of her blankie as a 'she.' This week though, through the busy-ness of our schedules, we could not find 'her.' We looked at school in the lost and found, we looked at home, in every nook and cranny. We looked in the car by her carseat. "But mommy, I can't find her. Will you keep looking?" "Yes, Ava. I will now go to sleep. She's around here somewhere- we'll find her." Saying that made my stomache sour, knowing full and well that I did not have a clue where blankie was. We still kept looking.

Well, Ava tried to go to bed that night and she knew that blankie was lost. She tried to go to sleep without 'her.'

She tossed and turned.

She began to mumble.

Then she began crying.

Moaning. "Please Lord, bring her back...

Bring blankie back to me.

I need her Lord. I can't sleep without her.

Find her and bring her back to me"

Oh- you guys, Clint and I stood in the hallway listening to her and our eyes filled with tears. "Poor thing" we thought. She is so sweet. "It will be hard for her to let blankie go." We couldn't do a thing about it. We had looked everywhere. We tore the house up looking for that wash-cloth sized light pink tattered blankie that has pieces of silk hanging off of it. We just knew the Lord was telling us that it was time for us to just let it go. I crawled in bed with her and held her until she fell asleep.

When we woke up the next morning, Ava had gotten in bed with us. Clint and I got out of bed before Ava and we made it into the kitchen, getting ready for the day. A few minutes later Ava walks into the kitchen with the biggest smile on her face. "Look mommy, look what I found?" To our amazement- Ava had found her blankie! "Where was it?" we asked. "It was in your room by your bed laying on the treadmill." No way! I would have seen it! It could not have been right next to my bed, I thought. I looked at Clint and he shook his head. "Wow-amazing."

As we were getting ready in the bathroom a little later that morning. I said, "Can you believe that? Ava cried out to the Lord for her blankie and she found it this morning..." She won't ever forget this." Clint stopped combing his hair and looked at me, "I won't ever forget this!"

This is just want we are studying right now in the book of Moses. Moses was chosen by God to lead the Israelites out of Egypt and the Israelites, who were freed slaves from Egypt began to complain to Moses. They had just witnessed the parting of the Red Sea and only three days later, they began to grumble as the Lord tested them in the desert.

Exodus 15:24 "So the people grumbled against Moses, saying"What are we to drink?" All they had was bitter water from the Marah. Then in Exodus 15:25 Moses cried out the Lord, and the Lord showed him a piece of wood. He threw it into the water, and the water became sweet."

Moses cried out to God and God gave Moses a piece of wood to throw into a bank of water and made it sweet- enough for 2 miliion Israelites to drink. That's alot of sweet water. That's a miracle. Kind of like Ava finding her blankie next to our bed after we looked up and down our entire house. God is truly amazing.

We think that most of the time we are here to teach our kids, grow them up to know and honor the Lord. Well this week, Ava taught us a valuable lesson. The next time I need something, whether it be a tattered blankie or sweet water, I will remember to first cry out to the Lord like Moses did- and my little Ava.

Hope you do too. :)

Tough Call

My journal entry reads Sunday April 27th 2008 "Father, if you want Clint & I to leave this church please show us how. We want to serve you. We want to please you. How do we know when to leave? Why do I think we need to leave?”

After speaking with a friend later this week, she in not so many words but with tears confirmed my hearts question. I began to moan, cry out. I felt like I was mourning the loss of a dear friend. “How Lord?”

Later that week three different times, on three separate occasions the name of Fielder Road was whispered to me. Great things were spoken about their children’s program, the senior pastor, and it was on my list of churches to visit from Dallas Theological Seminary list of alumni pastors. This is also the church that my dear sweet brother and his family attend.

Well, we were very busy in May and it proved to be a very trying time for us. We decided to take a month off from all of our church and homegroup responsibilities.

Meanwhile, I had began a bible study of a book called “A Woman After God’s Own Heart” by Elizabeth George. It was nice to dig into a study that would help me to focus on the ministry of my home and marriage. The following week we went on vacation. We were celebrating our 15th year wedding anniversary and decided to take the kids to Port Aransas for a few days.

I will never forget it. I was sitting at the end of the couch in this brightly decorated condo- all curled up with my bible and my lesson. Clint and the kids were asleep. The place was quiet. Just me and God. I was flipping through trying to find a verse for my bible study and that’s when a small verse popped out at me. I was stunned. I looked around, as if someone were watching.

Ecclesiastes 3:2 “there is a time to plant and a time to uproot.”

Wow. Here we have been praying about whether to stay or leave and this is the scripture I read. Uproot? Uproot from what God? In order to uproot there must be something deeply planted. This was my confirmation that in fact, we were to leave this church. We had been at this church for 10 years.

So we visit a few churches throughout the summer and realizing my need to be of a more submissive wife, I asked my husband again. Still-he had no clear answer. We attended Fielder for the first time in August and he did not feel spoken to. (That week they introduced the entire Children's Program ministry team and had a panel discussion) So I am thinking maybe I am wrong? Two weeks later we visited Fielder again. This time we surely felt the call. When we took Seth to first grade class he saw two of his best buddies from school. Ava had no problem going to her class- she was excited about 'tasting a new food' that morning. We settled into the sermon and I could tell Clint immediately took to the pastor’s style of speaking. He told me, “I felt as if he was talking directly to me.” Then there was another scripture confirmation of

Psalm 32:8 “I will teach you and instruct the way you should go.”

Anyone who knows me can tell you this scripture has been my 'life verse' this year. My Father in Heaven has been teaching me new things this past year. I just wanted to cry. While we were leaving Clint also ran into a man who made a deep impression of him- his first Discussion Leader from his Men’s Bible Study Fellowship.

When we left he told me “There is no doubt, that is where we are supposed to be.”

A little later that week, the second week in September he called the shepherd of our community group from PBC and told him the news. He got off the phone and said, “I told him, but he said he needs me to teach this Sunday.” I said, “Honey, I want to be supportive but I also think that it will be confusing and hard for the kids. “I know,” he said, “But I really feel like I need to help him.” Then I asked, “Well, what is the passage you will be teaching this Sunday?” He said, “I don’t know why don’t you go pull up the scroll online.” So I pull the scroll up online and print it off. To our amazement it was Ecclesiastes 3. God is truly amazing. His timing is perfect. His ways are not our ways...

Ecclesiastes 3 (New International Version)
A Time for Everything
1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6 a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
9 What does the worker gain from his toil?
10 I have seen the burden God has laid on men.
11 He has made everything beautiful in its time.

Clint said, “That is phenomenal.” We knew for sure God had spoken. He did teach at PBC that day. He told everyone in our Sunday morning community group that sadly, we were no longer going to be attending PBC. He told them it was this verse that was laid on our hearts in June that confirmed it. He met us for the 11 am service at our new church Fielder Road Baptist Church. It was definitely a tough call. We love our Pantego Bible Church family very much but know that God knows what is best for us.

Dancing In the Rain

I read a quote this week, actually I am a little embaressed to admit, but I read it on a Facebook Flair. You can find just about anything on a piece of flair, a symbol, a sign of something you like, or a quote that seems to fit. I chose the quote,



"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain."



I enjoyed that quote because I have been through some tough storms in the last seven years. Going through six miscarriages, resigning my position at a hospital after 15 years and leaving a place of worship I called home after 10 years. Those are storms. And yet, through it all, God has provided valuable insight of how He speaks to us through His word and provides for us, even in the storms. In fact, it has been in the storms where I became so close to God's face that I actually enjoyed being in the storm. When we stop and pray and seek God's guidance and flip through the pages of His word, He reveals Himself to us. To me, this is learning to dance in the rain. By allowing God to be glorified, we get the blessing and He gets the glory. So if you look at my Facebook, I have a proud display of a small pin that displays the quote, "Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain." Thanks for stopping by. May God be glorified through your next storm!

Seth's Three Blessings...

Not very good at "blogging" as I don't usually just like to post my thoughts to the world but today I thought to post warm thoughts from a soon-to-be 7 year old. Seth and Ava were fighting this morning and we gave them a time-out. Time to think, time to reflect. One hour, can you imagine? No television, no Wii, no electronic games. They both took to coloring pictures and writing "letters."

I sat down to pay bills online and Seth followed me in. He said, "Mom, I am bored. " I said, "You are?" as he continued to toss a ball in the air. I sat and thought, 'he has had time to think.' He said, "I've been good-I let Ava have the ball." I said, "Thank you." He looked at me and said, "Can I play the Wii?" (We rented MarioKart this week-which he loves). I turned to him and asked, "What are three good things in your life Seth?" He tossed the ball and caught it. He held the ball for a minute and then said, "I have good parents, I have Jesus in my heart and I love to play sports. I'm good at sports you know." I said, "Yes, Seth you are good at sports." Inside, my heart just melted. I could have have just cried right then. Wow. He could have said, "My Wii, my DS and my trampoline. But he didn't. He had time to reflect and think about what is truly meaningful in his life: His Family, His Jesus and the gift that Christ has blessed him with. So yeah, I let him go play Wii and decided to take a moment to post this as I cry in utter thankfulness for my God, my family and the person Christ continues to mold me into.